Many individuals afflicted with addiction may also be experiencing addiction spouse problems. Many times these problems magnify and can cause strife between husband and wife that frequently ends in divorce. Spousal problems come in a wide range of hurtful behaviors that lead to turmoil in both parties.
It is very common for spouses to make up excuses to hide the loved ones alcoholism or drug addiction from others. This is known as enabling in the addiction recovery field. Some examples of this would be calling in to the others place of work and saying that they will not be in due to stomach sickness, or he/she can not come to the phone right now they are sleeping and have to be up in a couple hours to go into work early.
Spousal Problems Caused by Alcohol and Drug Addiction
Making excuses for a spouse allows him or her to persist in their potentially lethal behavior and create further damage. Another form of spousal problems is denial. Denial is acting like everything is just fine and that a problem does not even exist. The thing about denial is that the person becomes very good at denying the problem to others and better yet of telling themselves nothings wrong.
If can be difficult trying to figure out what to do about spouse addiction problems, but there is help so that you don’t have to do it alone. Although you may feel helpless, you can take action. Believe it or not, you, yourself can actually be contributing to the situation without even knowing it, especially if you decide to do nothing. If you do nothing, then you are actually condoning the behavior and it will continue until you intervene.
The first step is to try and get them to admit that they have a problem. This good take a long time, but you must continue to work at it. While you are trying to accomplish this, you need to get support yourself. There are many addiction centers that offer counseling for spouses dealing with addiction in the family even if you are the only one who attends the sessions.
How to help a drug addicted Wife
How to help a spouse or husband with a drug addiction
The next step is to try and get your addicted spouseor husband into a rehab program. in order to be effective in doing this, you must sit down and talk to your spouse. Tell them how their addiction is affecting you and the family. Stress to them that they have your full support when deciding to get help. You may not be successful the first time depending on the severity of their addiction and how long it’s been going on. You must continue to stand firm and talk to them every chance you get, even when they don’t want to listen.
The most important part of this process is that you do not hesitate in your efforts to get your husband or wife help for their drug addiction. As long as you are in a support group or apart of a counseling program, they will also advise you on the proper steps to help your family. They will be your support so that you don’t feel like you’re completely alone. At the same time, you can help yourself deal with this tragedy.
My name is Art. I help people to recover.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
What do you have to say about a wife that complains about her husband being an addict and destroying their life while she herself uses with him and helps him sell drugs to pay bills. Don’t they both need help? Should they be together while he is seeking treatment if she doe not admit she has a problem too? Any advice?
Hi Matina
Sounds to me like they both do need help. I can say that if she does not admit she has a problem there is not much you can do.
I would say that if he is making a decision to stop using and go to treatment then it will be up to him to figure out that a wife who is still using will be detrimental to his recovery in other words he will be using in no time with her. Hope this helps answer your question.
good luck
my wife has a issue and we got her in the hospital but she is back on them. We don’t have insurance so I can’t get her in a rehab place and the hospital only keeps her for a few days and she is back home. I’m worried about the kids 2 and 5 while I’m at work. Any help on this?
Thank you
Hi Charles thanks for your comment
If she is only in the hospital a couple of days I would make sure that she goes to a meeting as soon as she gets out. There are plenty of women there that will be willing to help her to stay clean and sober.
If you are really concerned for your children’s welfare you may want to consider taking them to a sitter while you are at work or another option would be moving out and taking the children with you until she stops using. This may or may not jar her into taking a serious approach to recovering from her drug problem. This may seem harsh but it really may be necessary.
Good luck
Hi Charles thanks for your comment
If she is only in the hospital a couple of days I would make sure that she goes to a meeting as soon as she gets out. There are plenty of women there that will be willing to help her to stay clean and sober.
If you are really concerned for your children’s welfare you may want to consider taking them to a sitter while you are at work or another option would be moving out and taking the children with you until she stops using. This may or may not jar her into taking a serious approach to recovering from her drug problem. This may seem harsh but it really may be necessary.
Good luck